


small hands

by lumoshyperion



Category: Harry Potter and the Cursed Child - Thorne & Rowling
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Trauma, Unforgivable Curses (Harry Potter)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-27
Updated: 2020-01-27
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:48:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,872
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22437433
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lumoshyperion/pseuds/lumoshyperion
Summary: For the prompt, "trembling hands", I wanted to explore how Scorpius may have been affected in the days after Delphi inflicted the Cruciatus Curse on him.
Comments: 21
Kudos: 45





	small hands

It was easy for Malfoy Manor to feel cavernous and overwhelming. With its endless rooms, towering windows, and winding hallways that seemed to stretch on forever. Deeply foreboding when viewed from afar, it seemed like the last place one would want to raise a child. And yet Scorpius loved it. He felt safe, encased in those familiar walls as sunlight streamed through those towering windows. No matter how terrible or hopeless things got, he always had the security of a home. Of the knowledge that his parents were there, waiting for him.

But since returning from time with Albus and the others, it felt as though everything was out of balance. All the details of his home that he'd loved so dearly were thrown into a strange, unfamiliar context. The tree branches scratching at the windows. The darkness of an empty hallway in the middle of the night. The sound of his father tapping one of his rings on the glass of wine he had been drinking as he read one of the books from the library. 

Shaking his head, Scorpius looked away. His own book was discarded on the table in front of him. His hands had gone numb from being squashed between his thighs and the seat for the past half hour. But it was the only way to stop the trembling he'd been plagued with since the encounter with Delphi on the Quidditch pitch.

It wasn't so bad when he was preoccupied - shovelling snow from the garden without magic, writing letters to Albus, and cooking dinner with his father - it was only in quiet, still moments that it truly bothered him. At night, the trembling became so violent that his whole body was overcome with it. He hadn't slept in days. And he hadn't seen Albus since their parents had decided to keep them both at home for a week of recovery before sending them back to Hogwarts.

"When can I go back to school?" He asked his father, suddenly.

Draco looked up from his book and frowned. "Whenever you're ready, I suppose."

Taking in his father's furrowed brow as he glanced away and took a sip of his wine, Scorpius immediately regretted asking the question. He didn't want to leave. Not yet, at least. But the sound of the branches on the window and the ring tapping on the glass was getting to him. He had to go somewhere else. Do _something_ else. "Can I go up to the library?" He asked.

Draco sighed. "You don't have to ask for permission, Scorpius."

"I know," he replied, carefully tucking his hands under his arms as he rose from his chair. He briefly considered saying something else, as he stared at his father, but thought better of it and left without another word. He couldn't tell him. The trembling wasn't getting worse, but it hadn't gotten any better either. He just didn't want to trouble his dad. And he didn't want to go to Saint Mungo's and face those sterile, windowless walls again.

Once in the library, he set about finding books on unforgivable curses. He'd only read two of them so far, because his father had always walked in on him before he could get anywhere with his research. He knew the trembling would pass. It had to. He just wanted to know how much longer he had to wait. He was scared and he couldn't stop thinking about his mum.

As he turned to place one of the hardcovers he'd found over on the desk, it suddenly slipped from his fingers. He paused and looked at his hands. The shaking always seemed to start in his elbows, and only got worse as it went down his arms, through his hands, and right up to the tips of his fingers. If he stood there long enough and thought hard enough, he could feel himself standing out in the cold as Delphi aimed her wand at him while Albus sobbed on the ground. It wasn't always the pain he remembered the most. Sometimes other things were more vivid. Like a bad dream that only becomes worse the more he thinks about it the next day.

Bending down, he picked up the book and looked it over. It had landed face down on a chapter about the effects of a killing curse when the wizard casting it doesn't have the intention or the rage required for it to be effective. Scorpius shuddered and closed the book with a harsh snap.

"Sorry," he whispered, as he brushed his trembling fingers across the binding. 

"You always apologise to the books when you drop them." He looked up and found his dad standing in the doorway with a mug in his hand and a small smile on his face.

Scorpius clutched the book to his chest. "Mum used to, didn't she?"

"She did," Draco replied, before stepping towards the desk with the mug raised in front of him. "You forgot your hot chocolate."

"Thanks," he replied, but made no move to accept it from him. 

Draco looked at him, for a long time, and Scorpius suddenly felt the urge to cry. Things had been so much more honest and comfortable between them in recent days. They could spend hours together, without saying a word, and still feel comfortable and happy. The tremors were never as bad around his dad, and yet Scorpius still found himself trying to avoid him whenever he noticed it coming back. But looking up at him and feeling the distance between them, suddenly all he wanted to do was tell him. After a while, he finally placed the mug on the desk and said, "I'll leave you to it, then."

"Dad..." Scorpius started, making an aborted move towards his father who turned back and looked at him with confusion, and then concern. "Please stay."

Draco responded without hesitation, his voice impossibly gentle and quiet, "Of course."

And with a wretched sigh, Scorpius placed the book on the desk - surrendering the shield between him and his father - before sitting down and holding his hands out, with the palms facing up. He stared at them as they shook, bumping his knees and causing the chair to move underneath him. His father said nothing, and he refused to look up at him. "It's been happening since... since the Quidditch pitch," he clarified, listlessly. "Since Delphi."

Scorpius expected his dad to ask why he had kept this from him for so long. Or perhaps he would just stare at him with this quiet hurt behind his eyes and say that it was fine, when it clearly wasn't. But instead he kneeled down in front of the chair and tenderly took his hands in his. He turned them over, quietly watching them as they trembled. And then he drew them together and clasped them in his hands, so that they were still.

"It's not uncommon. And this case doesn't seem too bad," he explained, and the air of familiarity in his voice disturbed Scorpius. "It should only last for a few days. But I can put together something that will make it less... uncomfortable?"

He was looking up at Scorpius and waiting for an answer, but he found that he couldn't reply. He was staring back at those calm grey eyes, and that furrowed brow, and suddenly feeling safe again, like he had before all of this. "Okay," he said, finally - although his voice was thick with the promise of tears. "I just... I don't want to go to Saint Mungo's."

Draco shook his head. "We won't have to. I'll take care of you," he said, with determination, before letting go of his hands and rising to his feet. "I'll be down in the kitchens. I won't be long."

Scorpius nodded, looking down at his hands as he clenched them in and out of fists. Then, his dad reached down and laid a hand on his wrist. He looked up, and Draco planted a kiss on his forehead.

When he pulled away, he said, "I love you."

Scorpius sniffed. "I love you, too."

He didn't move from his seat as he watched him go. Even after he was long gone, and he couldn't hear him making his way down the stone steps anymore, he still stared at the doorway. He wasn't even thinking about the tremors, when suddenly a tap at the window shocked him from his reverie. It was a little brown owl with bright yellow eyes and an envelope tied to its leg. As Scorpius made his way over to the window, a small smile formed on his face. He'd recognised the owl immediately, even before he had opened the window and watched as it flew up to his shoulder and nibbled at his ear. 

It was a jolly little thing, totally unlike her owner. Even as Scorpius untied the letter, she was bobbing her head up and down and hooting joyfully.

"Here, Josie," he said, tapping on the windowsill until the owl flew back to her perch and nibbled his finger instead. "I don't have any food, but dad is down in the kitchens if you want to go ask him?"

Josie stared at him for a moment, before turning on her heel with an irritated hoot and flying off into the night.

Without a moment's glance at the scrawled name on the envelope, Scorpius tore it open and pulled out the letter within. He quickly unfolded it and set about devouring every word Albus had written.

_Dear Scorpius,_

_We decided to visit grandma and grandpa's house after all. They didn't ask about what happened, but I could tell that they wanted to._

_Grandma made a roast and grandpa took me out into the garden to show me a Muggle car he's been working on. The paint is all rusted and the seats have been torn up, but he had some really brilliant ideas for it. I've drawn one of them for you, what do you think? Grandpa wants your opinion._

Scorpius flipped the page to find an enchanted sketch on the other side. At first glance, it was a regular Muggle car, but then it suddenly expanded into more of a van shape. The sizes were disproportionate and one of the wheels wouldn't stop bouncing up and down, giving a comic effect that made Scorpius laugh before he turned the page again to read the rest of the letter.

_I keep thinking about going back to Hogwarts. I'm scared of what people will say. I'm scared of going back to the Slytherin dormitory - of seeing the Quidditch pitch out there, all empty and quiet._

_~~But the truth is~~ ~~I just want~~ I miss you. I keep thinking of jokes you'd love. Of things I want to tell you, but can't through letters like this. It feels like something huge happened that only the two of us understand, but without you here it's almost like it didn't happen at all. I'm scared of going back to Hogwarts, but I want to. Because you'll be there. _

_I hope you're okay. Let me know what you think of the drawing._

_\- A._

Scorpius folded the letter back up and smiled. His hands had stopped trembling.


End file.
